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Thursday, January 19, 2012

The Blackout is Over!!!

Wikipedia's 24-hour blackout to protest the proposed anti-Internet bills  H.R. 3261 and S. 968 is now over. As such, the staff here at Ducks has determined that our considerably-more-impressive protest blackout -- you know, the one that has been going since last April -- is also over.  


(Or maybe 2011 was a really awful year -- probably the worst since I lost my mom to cancer in 1999 -- and it is time to get back on my feet and bring you, my beloved billions of readers, even more award-winning content than ever before.)


If you've never heard the sound of the enter world rejoicing at once, take a minute and listen to the collective reaction to this news. That is what it sounds like.


I saw on CNN -- scrolling across the bottom of the screen, nonetheless -- that a company was going to have "slightly-less than expected losses" and couldn't help but wonder if that is cause for celebration or not? On one hand, slightly-less than expected losses" is considerably better than "significantly-more than expected losses." On the other, it's still losses. So do they break out the bubbly? Do they fire some office slackers (the ones who contributed to the not-enormous losses)? Do they hire me for a very large fee to fire some office slackers? If they were smart, they would!


(It's things like that that I wonder about... and fully assume that means you do, too.)


I like seeing what Internet searches are popular and trending. (The "trending" part is important, because if I'm just going with "popular," there would probably be a lot of results for adult-themed websites.)


Speaking of "adult-themed websites," people were looking up "Bikini bodyguards train in China." Bikini bodyguards? Are we really sure that Communism isn't the way to go? (Okay, I completely acknowledge that this isn't "adult-themed" -- more like "PG-13-themed" -- but I needed a good segue.)


Sometimes a good segue isn't needed.


It was recently brought to my attention that MTV ignored my pleas to send the Jersey Shore cast to Iran for the new season. I don't know what they are thinking. I mean, I'd actually watch the show if that was the premise.


Random rambling? Popular Internet searches?? Sending the Jersey Shore kids to the Middle East??? Clearly, Ducks is back! 





2 comments:

  1. Missed you! Welcome back...( Im all for the honchos at MTV sending those oompa loompas oerseas)

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