Monday, June 14, 2010

The Post That Made Holland, MI Famous

In doing research for this post, I stumbled (not literally...) across a website of anagrams. See, I wanted a title for the post -- even though the theme for today, and consequent writing of the post, was literally minutes away from even coming to mind -- that would capture the epic nature of these semi-coherent ramblings.

Clearly, not any title would do.

If you would be so kind as to allow me a brief, yet relevant digression... Yesterday I caught up with an old friend of mine. It has been over ten years since the last time we spoke, but he managed to find me via Facebook -- ironically, my arch nemesis -- and I'm quite glad he did.

I had made efforts to find him in the past, via this newfangled "Internet" thing. (It's a great novelty, but I don't see it catching on in the long term.) The wall I continually ran into, though, was the fact that I remembered his lengthy last name, being Polish, as having all sorts of vowels and consonants in random, unexpected places. I couldn't quite come up with the right combination. So my cyber-stalking exploits were somewhat less successful than his.

I've never been more grateful to have a short, easy to spell last name... except for that time when I was a kid learning how to spell my name. I was pretty grateful about it then, too.

One of those things I'll never forget from my childhood -- besides the ability to spell my short last name and tie my shoes -- was the fact that my buddy's dad had the largest collection of Schlitz memorabilia.

For those who aren't in the know -- and I realize that the typical Ducks reader is a highly informed and educated (and attractive) member of society, but I'm just sayin' -- the old Schlitz slogan was "The Beer That Made Milwaukee Famous."

Clearly, this is extremely apropos.

Yes, the word of the day here at the Ducks is "clearly."

(And you all know the "word of the blog.") Anyhow....

So I googled "the beer that made milwaukee famous." (Note: I was born in Milwaukee and lived there for the first 12 years of my life, so I know that it is capitalized, as is the case with most fashionable major cities. But I also know that Google doesn't care if it is capitalized in my search… Uh, just thought I should disclose that.)

The fourth search result had something to do with anagrams. This got me thinking...

Recently I was listening to the local classic rock station and they were playing The Doors' song "L.A. Woman," wherein Jim Morrison sings about Mr. Mojo Risin'. That is an anagram of his name and, I've got to admit, it's a pretty cool anagram to have.

Other great anagrams belong to William Shakespeare (I'll make a wise phrase), Clint Eastwood (Old West Action), and Lady Gaga (Clearly Insane).

Okay, maybe I made one of those up.

The thing I don't like about anagrams is that there isn't one that works for me. Sure, "been John" might be alright... if my name wasn't already John! C'mon! (Besides, that only flips my last name around, too.) Although, maybe I can come up with something if I include my middle name. Hold on a sec...

*Thinks real hard.*

Still there? Whew. Thought I might have lost you over all those hours I spent thinking about it. Of course, one simply cannot overestimate the loyalty of a Ducks Out Of A Row reader!!

Here’s the anagram I came up with (middle name included): J. writes amazing, insightful and the greatest blog posts in the history of the world.

Ya'll welcome.


  1. I've never played around with my name before but I kinda like what I came up with. Now when I climb to The Door's success level, I can write my song "Pretend Now Dr. Dreamer!"

    A longer name definitely has more to work's hell to grow up with though.

  2. Hey, your name makes the same anagaram as mine! (And my middle initial IS actually "J")

  3. i don't see the internet catching on either.
    been john.
    fricking hysterical, dude.

  4. Dorn - If your anagram is for real (and I don't mean "for real like mine was"), that is awesome!

    Wendy - I'd have been surprised if it didn't. ;)

    Ed - Thanks, man! I'm just glad we're able to get some use of this internet thing before it goes the way of Betamax, New Coke or intolerance. (Wait, intolerance is still around? Why?)

  5. Ahahahaha... I had found you before, and then I forgot about you (Oh, don't worry, I forgot about everyone for awhile there) and then I remembered you again! I'm glad because this made me laugh.

    An anagram for my name would be: "A Mopish Horn Mutton" but I'm not sure that makes any sense at all. Either that or there is a secret message...

  6. I was on a flight once, I think it was on Virgin Airlines, and they had this anagram game. I was so into it I didn't want the flight to end.

    That's when I realized that I was a complete nerd.

  7. Aching - I think you have some real anagram possibilities with those letters! Hmmmm... A Mopish Horn Mutton just might be the secret meaning of it all, though.

    M.P. - As a self-professed dork, I really need to start flying Virgin Airlines.

    You know, they should use that as some sort of ad campaign. Bill Gates could be the spokesperson!! :)

  8. The problem with word scrambles and anagram games is that once you start playing them you can't stop playing them.

    Tragically, anagrams for "straight guy" include "gay gut shirt" or "gay sight rut"

  9. SG - That's funny. Too bad Gay Guy doesn't have a lot of options. I mean, I certainly understand about short words not working out the best (as indicated way up there...), but the two g's and y's really screw him over, too.

    At least he had his fabulous parade the other day. That should help any anagram blues he might be feeling!

  10. pssh. It's been an endless source of amusement to me to be married to the best-anagrammed name person on the planet. Kirsten Elisabeth Kohl has exactly one two-word anagram. I'll leave as a challenge to the duckership (readerduck?) to find out what that is.

  11. Baloo - I'm going to bring this topic back up in a post on Monday -- or this weekend if I feel particularly ambitious -- just so the duckership (works better...) can take a crack at it!


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