Do any of you fellow bloggers ever un-follow blogs?
I recently went through and un-friended some people on Facebook. Not that these are bad people or anything like that, but I accepted almost any "friend request" back when I started using the site. (It was the mid-80's, if I remember correctly.)
After a while it was like "Yeah, [insert female name] was on the women's swim team at the college where I was on the men's team and seemed like a nice person, but she never actually said a word to me... ever. Since being a Facebook "friend," she hasn't contacted me or anything. I think she just wants to inflate the number of friends she has."
I refuse to be just a number!
Well, there were one or two un-friendings because I realized that I didn't particularly like the guys. I never should have added them in the first place, but after awhile it was painfully obvious that they were kind of d-bags.
Oh, and the nosy guy from work got the boot. I never have anything bad to say about my place of employment, but my heart is not into my job and my ultimate goal is to leave -- which I'm working on -- but don't need a nosy, gossipy dude to report on it.
There might have been a couple others for various reasons, but I think you get the picture now.
Anyhow, I suppose that I don't feel the need to have 9000 Facebook "friends" who mostly would qualify as "barely acquaintances," you know? I'd rather have a handful of true, genuine people who have authentic relationships with me.
Well, this relates to my little blogging world. (By "little," I mean "internationally-popular, uber successful and pretty much the single greatest blog to hit the world since the invention of sliced bread.")
We all have followers, both active and lurkers (still hate the term...), and follow blogs ourselves. In a way, it is kind of like having Facebook friends. Some people want to have thousands. I'll take a few, loyal followers any day of the week. Twice on Sundays. (Never got the whole "twice on Sunday" expression, but the popular kids are using it and I'm trying to fit in, so let's roll with it.)
I don't know how, but I started following this one blog in particular... and I'm not sure if I want to continue doing so. See, this blogger has complained that no one follows them -- yes, I realize that the plural pronoun is grammatically incorrect in this instance, but I am committed to staying gender neutral for the sake of true anonymity -- yet they are adamant about not following others or leaving comments, etc.
I've learned that if you want active followers, you need to be an active follower yourself. I'm not saying that you need to go and leave "empty" comments (well, unless you want them in return...), but if you want people to actually read and leave conversational comments, you should probably do the same.
This other blogger wants to take without giving and I don't think things work out like that.
Does it take time and effort? Hell yeah. I probably spend too much time reading and commenting on blogs I follow. But the ones I keep up with are interesting and I happen to like interesting stuff. (Yeah, I'm weird like that.)
If I comment on your posts, you are doing something right. Keep doing it. ("He's kind of bossy.")
And if I'm commenting, it means I haven't un-followed you. The other day -- I love that term because it could be read as though there were only two days: the one and the other -- Wendy Ramer had mentioned that regular commenters become friends of sorts. I totally dig that.
In life, I'm most concerned with genuine relationships... even here in the blogosphere, which is only "kind of like" life. I'm really starting to appreciate the ones we form in this microcosm of ours.
So, uh, I just wanted to share that. Yeah.